Drinking from the Garden Hose

What's up! Here we go again! Another year, another January. This time of year does feel significant and full of hope. The holidays are behind us and we can embrace that 'clean slate' mentality and dream about who we want to be and what we want to do in this calendar year. Taking a moment to reflect on the past 12 months - the struggles, the triumphs - helps me feel deep gratitude for the journey and our ability to be resilient.  At the beginning of last year, I knew a few people around my age that died by suicide. When this type of death occurs, we all want to understand 'why', often dissecting their personal/professional/romantic/financial situations... making sweeping statements like 'but they had it all!'. Many conversations with colleagues and friends focused on how perfect that someone's life appeared on the outside, not what was going on internally. Is it appropriate to share your mental health status at the office? Should we be vulnerable and open

Y'all, I LOVE summer. I could care less about chunky sweaters and I really don't like anything pumpkin flavored, so I can do without all and winter. I've been spending as much time as possible at the beach, swimming in the ocean and just staring out into the endless horizon. After our Tahiti vacation where I enjoyed every second of indulging in all the croissants, dessert crepes and coffee, my mind was in a great place but my body was feeling the effects of all the gluten, sugar and caffeine. As a millennial, it was my duty and obligation to my loyal followers to post constantly about my vacation (LOL). So, I also deleted the Instagram app off my phone for 40 days - I personally like taking breaks from Insta throughout the year, helps knock down your screen time immensely. It's funny how the first ~week I would automatically grab my phone and swipe to where the app was, and then realize the app isn't there so I'd go pick up a book or go back to work or call a fr

I’m sitting here in a lounge chair, staring out at the South Pacific Ocean soaking up the sun. Suntanning is at the top of my guilty pleasures list. The French Polynesian islands are absolutely magical! We started our 14 day trip in Tahiti and have been on Moorea for the majority of the time. It takes a few days to acclimate to island time, but now that I’m on it I’m CHILLIN HARD. Sleeping in as late as I please, having a coffee and a croissant by the ocean, snorkeling with tropical creatures and eating fresh fruit and seafood has been the daily ‘routine’ down here. Reading books in the sun for hours is a version of heaven. Screen time has been minimal, haven’t touched a computer and I left my phone off for a couple days. We’ve been puzzling at night and leaving the TV off. It’s officially been over a YEAR since I’ve had any alcohol to drink! We ate dinner at a restaurant recommended by some locals on the day of my sober-versary and we didn’t realize until everyone started to order dri

On pretty much every single podcast I've listened to lately, the conversation is around how much people are STRUGGLING. Glennon Doyle and her sister did an episode about burn out and how they are empty. Brené Brown has a lot to say about how the pandemic is taking a toll on everyone - just today she posted that she will be taking a 3 month sabbatical to regroup and recharge. WOW! I hope to see more leaders and influential people choose to take a step away instead of continue to plow forward. In 2019 I experienced extreme burnout and had to step away from corporate America for 9 months - #normalizesabbaticals! Aren't we all looking around wondering what the hell is going on? Just this morning I had several in person meetings for May and June get rescheduled to virtual due to a recent spike in COVID cases from employees that attended IRL offsites. We've all adapted wildly to this pandemic, and it's been INTENSE. Life has been hard and it's felt hard. Most people I kno

Thirty one trips around the sun! Today I turned thirty one years old. Last year when I turned thirty it felt like a significant milestone and I felt markedly older. This year, I feel more mature mostly because I kept forgetting my birthday was approaching and for the first time ever did not make everyone celebrate my birthday daily for all of April :). I forgot to take off work, so my day has been scattered with virtual video calls, but I still had time to go to my favorite coffee shop in town this morning, lay in the sun and take a long beach run. Since I quit caffeine, my go-to order is a Golden Turmeric latte - turmeric, coconut oil, whole milk and cinnamon - delicious! We also got croissants (I wrote in my gratitude journal this morning that I would celebrate with carbs and sugar). This will be my first booze-less birthday in over a decade! I have a cute photo my college roommate took of me holding my ID the day I turned 21 at a chic bar grown up bar (for a college town) that actua

I've been to Las Vegas AT LEAST fifteen times in the past ten years, primarily for tech conferences. I've left Vegas so hungover I've puked in the airport toilets, had panic attacks next to coworkers on flights back to Seattle, lost purses (Omnia night club once recovered and MAILED my Tory Burch bag to me, wow still shocked) and usually leave vowing never to drink again or return to Sin City. This time however, I was there for a bachelorette weekend nine and a half months into my new life sans booze. Going into the trip I was trepidatious about how I would feel being in such a mania inducing, stimulating, alcohol fueled environment... arguably THE MOST alcohol centric city on planet Earth... but I had the best time I've ever had in Las Vegas without a single sip of alcohol and no drugs! Sober in Sin City! Tackling milestones like this in sobriety give you a lot of confidence, and for me, reinforces that this is one of the best decisions I've ever made and I can con

At Amazon we have a concept called the "two pizza team", which is kind of like our version of Goldie Locks and the perfect soup temperature. If you have a project and need other people to help execute the idea, you need enough people that you require more than one pizza to feed them lunch, but lean enough that two pizzas should get the job done. Two pizza team! Lately, I've been having a lot of conversations with others about mental health and the type of support system it takes to achieve and maintain a healthy and stable system. Well, for me, it takes more like a ten pizza team. Since I was diagnosed as Bipolar I last year, I've had to add a few players to my bench. I've been seeking treatment from a psychiatrist who prescribes me essential medication. My yoga teachers have been at the center of my well-being for over ten years now, and those special people continue to add immense value to my life from near and far. I'd also consider all the Peloton instruct